I have been asking myself if I had the chance to do our kids’ younger years over again, knowing what I know now, would I choose to be a stay-at-home-mom? Each time, my answer is “yes.” But I would probably do things differently.
Here’s the thing, I never imagined life beyond the younger years. It’s strange to think that I never pondered life with older kids. Did I think my kids would be perpetually young and I would always be needed to hold down the fort at home? So strange. I never envisioned going back to work. It’s not that I didn’t want to. It didn’t cross my mind.
Now here I am, walking the bumpy road of re-entry and career change, riddled with self-doubt and comparing myself to others in the same space or doing the work I want to do—peers who are younger, but seemingly more confident and capable because they have more years of doing the actual work than I do. Perhaps I should have started my post here (!) since self-doubt and feelings of inadequacy are at the root of my questions like, “What could I have done differently?”
Going down the “what if” road for too long is a waste of time, but if our daughters (or sons) one day have children and choose to stay home with them, I think I will mention that a time may come when they will consider going back to work. Not in a pushy way, of course. There is no right answer or one way to do life. But the reality is, our kids grow up. Most will eventually leave the house. I have many mom friends whose youngest kids are now in elementary and beyond returning to work. It’s a bit of a trend.
As for what I would do differently knowing what I know now? Stay tuned.