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Re-entry: Taking Up the Laptop Bag Again (Start here)

  • Career

Flashback 10 years…I traded in my laptop bag for a diaper bag. Presently, I am putting myself on the market–the job market, that is. It is daunting, to say the least. I fear the dreaded, “So what did you do to keep your skills current?” question. Is there value in mentioning my volunteer activities? Sources say yes, but I wonder, “Is that enough?” Or, will it be viewed as fluff? I ask myself constantly, “Am I enough?” I KNOW that I am very good at certain things. I am resourceful, creative, and a great problem-solver. It’s what made me a good programmer and project manager in my past life. However, my tangible skills, the kind that show up on a resume feel outdated and dusty. Hence, my confidence crisis.

Despite the fact that my MBA has sat on a shelf unused for a large part of the past decade, I never regretted pursuing an MBA or the choice I made to stay home to raise our four children full-time. If given the chance to start over, I would make the same choices all over again.

Re-entry Step #1: Ditch Your Email Address

  • Career

Do you really want to be (pre)judged by your email address?

If you still have a Hotmail, Yahoo, or AOL email account listed on your resume, change it now.  It dates you instantly.  Set up a Gmail account and forward messages to your existing account if you just can’t bear to part with it (like me ;))

Full disclosure: I only signed up for Gmail about a month ago for reasons completely unrelated to my recent job search.  I recently started working as a background actor (or “extra”) for film and commercials (look for me in future Amazon and Google ads!) and for one of my jobs they were seeking 20- to 30-somethings.  I submitted anyway, got the job, and when I showed up, it was clear that I was old enough to be a parent to some of the actors.  I went into stealth mode, ducked my head and kept to myself, trying not to be “found out”, afraid that I would be pulled from the project.  The project wrapped and I felt relieved that no one was the wiser, until I remembered that an email list went out at the start of the project and I realized that it would be apparent to anyone looking at the list that was not a millennial.  Good news for me, but it made me examine my public identity.  I’m not ashamed to be over 40, but there is no need to advertise it, especially when seeking employment after a significant break.

I used to chuckle at people who still used their AOL addresses and it didn’t register that I was only one step away!  Please tell me I am not the only one who has been blind to the changing times and/or reluctant to embrace change.

Re-entry Step #2A: Get Out There

  • Career

I had so many questions about looking for a job, but I was afraid to put myself out there. After spending ten years out of the workforce, I felt irrelevant–a complete dinosaur. My questions ranged from the very basic and practical (“Where do I go to search for jobs? Is Monster.com still around?”) to the ones that rattled me to the core (“Do I still have what it takes?  Does anyone want what I have to offer?”). I read that one of the first steps to finding work is networking, or even more simply, telling people you’re looking.

Telling others I wanted to go back to work felt easier said than done. I knew what questions would come my way:

“What are you looking for?” “What is your work experience?”

I was having a major crisis of confidence. My work experience felt skimpy given my age. I constantly compared myself to my peers who continued to work post-children. Post-grad school, I switched career paths and I had not invested enough time to find my niche or become a subject-matter expert of any kind. I also had no idea what I wanted to do. I had ideas about what I could do or might want to do, but was afraid to put myself out there without a clear plan or goal, for fear of embarrassing myself or wasting someone’s time.

After attempting to figure out the re-entry process on my own, I hit a wall. My mind was running in circles, asking the same questions, and not getting the answers I needed. So, finally, I reached out to three mom friends who had recently returned to work. My hope was that they would be the most empathetic, understanding, and therefore, safe. My text message to one friend read: “Do you mind sharing with me again what you do for work? How has it been juggling FT work and family? Where do you work and do you enjoy it? I’m in the market for a flexible PT job.” To my surprise, she quickly replied, “…Wanna get together for lunch?  I can share tips on the re-entry process.” Floored. It was that easy and not as scary as I imagined to put myself out there. I couldn’t believe I had wasted so much energy and time worrying about perfecting my story before telling someone that I wanted to go back to work. Here was a mom who offered to specifically and proactively help me with the re-entry process and all it took was a simple message. In retrospect, my fears seem silly and unjustified. However, at that time, re-entry after ten years felt like that proverbial 1,000-mile journey; a journey, that thankfully, also starts with just a single step.

A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. ~ Chinese proverb

Re-entry Step #2B: Tell Everyone You’re Available

  • Career

…to work, that is!

I was not at all prepared for the intimidation and trepidation I felt when I made the decision to seek employment. Without a clear idea of what I was looking for, I started browsing job posting sites. But first, I had to figure out where to look. “Is monster.com still around?” I wondered. (It is! However, it’s not the most popular.). I searched for my old role, part-time jobs, contract jobs, telecommute jobs, and every combination you can think of. I even uploaded my resume to one of the job search sites and applied for a couple positions, but it felt like a futile exercise. I honestly have never had any luck with online job sites. Also, knowing that recruiters use keywords to search their candidate pool, I decided my resume needed a major refresh (more on that later), otherwise, I was just wasting my time and energy.

I started reading articles and talking to moms who went back to work (outside of the home) and the consistent advice is: “Tell people you are looking for a job.”

As someone who tends to shy away from networking events, this felt scary. So I decided to stick with my friend network, and one day while sitting with a friend poolside watching our boys play, I mentioned wanting to explore freelance web development and asked if she needed any help with her website. (I had acquired some basic knowledge and skills over the years as the volunteer webmaster at my kids’ schools.)

A few weeks later, she reached out and gave me my first job! If you have a desire to return to work, but don’t know where to start, start with your friends. Tell them you are back on the market!

Have you tried this? I would love to hear about your experience!

…Things That Spark Joy

  1. Clean laundry
  2. Scented candles
  3. Clean home (elusive for me)
  4. Alamo Drafthouse – love the whole experience
  5. Puppy snuggles
  6. Kid snuggles

…Places I Want to Visit

  1. Santorini, Greece – I hear it looks just like the photos. I recently learned that Santorini is extremely crowded and the restaurants cater to tourist palates (big thumbs down!). Friend said she liked Milos much better.
  2. Grand Canyon – I love road trips and have traveled through or lived in most of the 50 states, and I have even flown over it several times, but I still have yet to visit this national wonder.
  3. Vietnam – In grad school, I studied abroad in Bangkok for 8 weeks. Vietnam was just a short trip from there, but there was so much to see in Thailand, Vietnam would have to wait!
  4. South Korea – This is my motherland. There is a saying that as we, Koreans, get older we begin miss our country of our birth. I wasn’t actually born there, but I do feel a greater tug as I get older.
  5. Tuscan Countryside, Italy – I know, so cliche. In college, I backpacked across Europe and fell in love with Italy. I loved everything about it—the landscape, the people (and their zest for lift!), the culture, and of course, the food. The only thing I didn’t like was the lack of transparency and consistency when it came to currency exchange.